whatever

oh crap, i really havent been loyal to this thing, have i? xD hahaha well, truth be told, i forgot i made this thing :P alright, lets just skip the crap and REALLY talk about whats going on inside me. *sigh, it's been more than half a year since my boyfriend dumped me. (i know, i know, and now a bunch of you are rolling your eyes and thinking "oh no, not ANOTHER blog about heartbreak") well the thing is, its not really heartbreak. its more like...i miss him, but im fine without him. you know what i mean? its just.. this whole experience has really made me think, and i realize that, people are so stupid. when we are so dependent and focused on one thing, its hard to give it up, even if that thing is total crap. like my friend's boyfriend. he treats her like trash, just uses her for sex...but for some reason, she wont leave him. she feels nothing for him though..ive asked her countless times why she wont find someone new, but no, she doesnt want to leave him. just today, i told her that the only reason she wont move on is because she would rather be treated like trash then not have anyone be there for her. (not like the friken douche is there for her anyways -.-") *sigh. so yeah, now i realize, the reason i keep thinking about my ex is because for a while he had been my support, my 3pm..but now that hes gone...its like, im unstable. ughhhh i would be lying if i said im totally over him, but i wouldnt want to get back together with him either. aghh who am i kidding? i cant stop thinking about him...so is it weird how i want him to find another girl as fast as possible? i know who he likes now...and for some strange reason i want them to be together. maybe it'll help me forget him? *shrug.....